first of all, I was up too late last night. That's ok, though. It was worth it. And I wasn't tired.
So after my 9am class I came back to my room and went back to sleep. I had some pretty horrendous dreams. Not frightening, but sad. I woke up nearly in tears. In spite of that, though, it was nice to sleep.
Ate lunch, read a book for a while, and was sitting on the couch in the lobby realizing that I'm not going to do anything else today. I'm just going to be a lazy bum and not go to class or to work. Going to sit--actually, lie--here on my bed and do nothing. When this diary entry's finished, I think I'll go back to sleep.
What were the dreams about?
Leif, mostly.
After talking to him last night I went to bed with that horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach only feeling worse. No reason for that. Everything he said should've made me feel better.
It didn't.
And then in this dream--dreams are so stupid to be upset about, hm?--he said some really cruel things. Just a dream. But my subconscious is the real one saying them and it doesn't shut up once I wake up. It just kind of retreats against all of the noise of the outside world.
My subconscious and I are going back to bed.
Love,
Beth
today, too?